Monday, January 28, 2013

A Lesson in Life

Tonight I'll post something really really sad. I know in my previous post I told you that I wanted this year with good vibes, but in order for me to start that; I have to get something off my chest first.

I have been itching to share this with someone. I believe that if you let go of something, you'll feel less pain. No, it’s not a breakup or something, yes, I do sound like it, but it's not. I'd like to consider this post as a tribute to someone. Someone that is close to my heart.

Honestly, one of the reasons why there’s a need to share this is because there's a feeling of guilt and regret in me. Things that made me realized what kind of person I was and consequently, taught me a wonderful lesson in life.

This someone is a cousin of mine. He was a playmate of my kids and he used to sleepover our house all the time. He even calls me mommy.  He was just three years old. Although he looks like a handsome mestizo with fair skin, charming smile, and curly hair, he wasn't the typical kind of kid. He was somehow different from other kids. He had this unusual behaviour.

Since then, the narrow-minded part of me changed the way I treated him. Not that I mistreated him, don’t get me wrong. I never came to that point. Thank God. It’s just, I didn't kiss and hug him anymore. I didn't pay him much attention. There was a time when he was knocking on the door calling me “Mommy open,” but I was too tired and sleepy that time, so I just let him knocked and he didn't stop for like more than five minutes, I guess. Now I totally regret it. I should have opened the door no matter how tired I was. I mean, What the hell I was thinking he was just three years old?! The words “mommy open” with his husky sweet little voice keep playing in my mind and each time I feel hurt. I hated myself for that.  

You know what’s worst? It happened the day before he died.

It was November 2, 2012, when he died in our house for unknown reason. His mom said he had very high fever that night and the next morning she woke up, he was already gone. We rushed him to the hospital, but it was too late.

Because of him, I learned something, and I’m thankful to him. I learned not to judge. I learned not to be careless. I learned that instead of avoiding someone's "not-so-good side," help him and teach him. I learned to be more sensitive and to understand/empathize other people. I learned to always give kindness to people around me.

I know I am a changed person because of that.
It was a sudden paradigm shift.

Truly he's an angel.

Guys, Have you watched the “Like Stars on Earth or Taare Zaamen Par by Aamir Khan?” I really recommend you to watch it. I guess it is the best movie that could explain how I felt. It is really an eye-opener and heartwarming movie. 

Monday, January 21, 2013

New Year, Endless Possibilities.

Hi! I missed blogging so much. right now, I am in a hurry, but since I'm so eager to post something, I'll just have a quick short post.

Oh a lot of things happened to me last 2012, I had a lot of negative and positive experiences all in one year. But I believe those experiences whether good or bad made me a stronger and better person.

Lets just hope and pray for the best this 2013.

to start off the year with good vibes,

I want to share to you guys one of best things that happened to me last year(2012).
which was..

yes, I passed the LET board exam, which was really unexpected because I know I didn't review that much because I was busy with my small business for clothing and bags(didn't mention it because it was a failure. Better luck next time. Hehehe) But thank God for the consequence of passing the LET. Alhamdulillah. :)

Honestly, taking education units after college wasn't really my plan. I was planning to enroll in a master's degree program but then I was late for the enrollment at my chosen university. Apparently, my eagerness to study again was pushing me, so I looked for a school that still accepts students and while I was driving, I saw a tarpaulin that the school near our house offers Professional Teaching Program. My husband said that I should try while waiting for the next semester. That day, I went to the school office just to inquire, the dean explained to me what the program is about and how it could help me with my career so I ended up enrolling instead. hahaha.  Not that I can easily be convinced but, on the spur of the moment, I felt like it was the right thing to do. Then the next day, I was sitting inside the class full of regret, asking myself, "what was I thinking yesterday? Do I really belong here?" hahahaha. You see, life really takes us to unexpected paths or let me quote Sophie Kinsella who is one of my favorite authors, "Life really takes us in different paths. It is not up to us to evaluate or judge them, merely respect or embrace them." :)

Wishing you all with endless possibilities in this life and may you find the right one. :) Be positive!

Perhaps in my case, time to earn a Master's degree? In Shaa Allah

Guys, If it happens that you're going to take the LET board exam and you have questions/concerns, I'll be glad to help. I may not be good but I'll do my best. I really want to give something back. Just leave a comment below.

much love! :))

Wish you guys a blessed and Happy New Year.